Sunday, June 7, 2015

Sunday, June 07, 2015 - No comments

I'm going to be okay.

One of my biggest fears when I got divorced, was not being able to find anyone again. It's tough going through a divorce, and always in the back of your mind is the thought that this might be the end of me ever having someone in my life. As I have moved along this path, and started to open myself up to those who I could possibly share my life with, I have learned a lot about myself.

The fear that once plagued me, of being alone, has now been replaced with the knowledge that I am okay on my own. I am strong enough, I am good enough, and I am going to be alright. I'm not going to lie to you and tell you that I like being alone. Who would? It's hard some days to come home from work and not have anyone here to ask how my day was, or to give me a hug when I need it. But I know that those things will come in time.

Right now, I am striving to find myself. Who am I really? Am I where I want to be in life? Am I happy with my choices? I've changed a few things about myself that I knew needed to go. I have started finding those things that make me truly happy. I'm trying to make peace with my ex husband, so that we together can be the best parents for our daughter. I won't tell you that it easy, some days when I look at him all of the hurt and anger come back without warning. But I am trying, we're trying.

I hope that by being able to accept these things, that I am in fact growing and healing. I know that in the end I'm going to make it through this. And I know that when I reach the end of this path, that I am going to be the best person I can be. I am going to be happy, healthy and whole again.

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